A FEW ODDS AND ENDS

I'm a lame Cubs fan. How lame, you ask? So lame that, for years, I've wanted to design my own Cubs jersey, which - theoretically - I would have created just for me, and worn to games and such. Well, my photoshop skills are pretty decent these days. Here's what my Cubs jersey would look like:



Having had a good look at it, I'm thinking it might be better off with blue stripes rather than red, and perhaps a red logo rather than a blue.

While I was seeking the proper logo for my fantasy jersey, I stopped by the Iowa Cubs website. Did you know that for just $10, you can watch every Iowa game this year online? That's actually a pretty sweet deal, especially compared to the $80 or so that it costs to watch a Cubs game. Not to mention that the Iowa Cubs should be a pretty exciting team to watch.

I might move my most recent Goat Riders photoshop over to this site, as it might be deemed too vulgar for my sister-site. Apparently having a "Dusty Baker" lineup card with penis, boobs, and dry ball-shaving jokes might be just a little too much for Goat Riders. Oh well.

Cheers.

THE BEST ROUTE

With all due respect to James, I am still advocating a Felix Pie promotion. Especially now, in the face of a long-term loss of Derrek Lee.

Here's why: as the situation stands currently, the Cubs lineup looks like this, on most days:

Juan Pierre
Jerry Hairston Jr./Ronny Cedeno
Todd Walker
Aramis Ramirez
Jacque Jones
Matt Murton
Michael Barrett
Ronny Cedeno/Jerry Hairston Jr.
Pitcher

To be honest, as long as Walker is hitting, that's not a terrible lineup. Especially if Aramis turns up his production. I mentioned it at Goat Riders ... at the time Derrek Lee went down with his injury, Aramis Ramirez was batting .196 with 2 homers and 6 RBI. The Cubs still managed to go 9-5 at that point. I reckon that, if Walker stays productive, and Aramis starts hitting, then there won't be a notable decline in offensive production. Which isn't to say that offensive production will be as good as it could be, because obviously it would be better with Derrek in the lineup, but it should be adequate.

The problem is Jerry Hairston. He might put up tolerable numbers in the #2 spot, but he might not. He's not a great player, or even a good one. He's adequate at best, and realistically, he's mediocre as a starter. He's still a better choice than Neifi, who should continue to see increased play in the middle infield now that Walker has been taken from the second base equation, but I don't think he'll cut it on an every-day basis at second base. Meanwhile, John Mabry is going to see more time at first base, which is bad news. The guy shouldn't even be on a major league roster. He's done.

So, here's my proposal. According to some stories I've read, Jacque Jones played some first base in high school and college. I think he could handle first for the Cubs as well as Walker, anyway. That makes room for Felix Pie to be promoted to right field, where, even if he's not exactly ready for the Majors, I suspect he'd still put up better numbers than Jerry Hairston or Neifi Perez. Todd Walker can move back to second base, and the lineup is suddenly a bit better.

The thing about Felix is that he appears to be an immensely talented outfielder, and also he appears to be intensely smart. He's also produced at every level and he's a competitor. If he does well, he could be another Juan Pierre with more pop at the top of the order. If he doesn't do well ... well, he'll still be better than Jerry or Neifi. I really believe that.

Here's what my theoretical lineup might look like:

Pierre
Pie
Walker
Aramis
Murton (I said theoretical, didn't I?)
Barrett
Jones
Cedeno
Pitcher

To me, at least, this looks a little better. I think it's worth consideration, but I suspect that won't happen for a few weeks at least, and only if Hairston and Neifi tank at second. Let's wait it out and see.

IS IT TOO EARLY FOR A PIECE OF PIE?

Over at Goat Riders, I recently speculated that Felix Pie has earned his chance to play at Wrigley. This caused Jason (Goat Rider Famine) to suggest that the Cubs shouldn't make another Pattersonesque mistake, and that Pie would benefit from a full year at Triple A.

Ok, yeah, maybe. I can see that. But there are a few striking differences between Corey Patterson and Felix Pie.

One was heralded as a great talent from the moment he was drafted. The other earned a name for himself by playing with great talent in the minor leagues. Felix wasn't a huge prospect when the Cubs signed him, but he's certainly earned his accolades by performing well at every level he's played on.

Corey has no mentality for the game. He doesn't know how to think when he's in the batter's box. He swings from his heels and he's unwilling to correct his mistakes.

Felix is a smart player who actually plays to in-game situations. Pie loves playing the game of baseball, and he loves winning. Even though his power numbers have increased in recent years, I get the feeling that Felix isn't going to start swinging from his heels no matter how much more money he could make by hitting 30 homeruns a year.

And, this might be the biggest difference between Felix and Corey, and the best reason Felix should get promoted: Pie is more talented than Jacque Jones.

It's just food for thought. I don't see how it could hurt to leave Felix at Triple A for another month or more, but if he keeps playing incredibly solid baseball, Dusty will have to make room somewhere.

THE ROCKET

Just a random thought, which I'm posting here instead of at Goat Riders, since I post there too much anyway:

Maybe the Cubs should think about getting Roger Clemens. Sure, the guy's an asshole, and a mercenary (meaning, he'd ask for a ton of money), and his body is beginning to fail him, but there are a few good reasons to get him, too. Besides, ESPN Insider laid out that he could be available, although he's looking at Boston according to the rumors. Anyway, here are the reasons why:

1. He's still really good.

2. A month off means he might stay healthy the rest of the year.

3. It would be really, really cool to have two 300 game winners on one team - especially if both are pitching effectively.

4. Like Maddux, Clemens might be able to provide an interesting perspective to the younger pitchers - especially Prior and Wood, who have a similar style to the Rocket. (Clemens does all the things they want to do with a baseball, but he's usually efficient. He rarely needs to throw more than 110 pitches in 8 innings of work - something Prior, Wood, and Zambrano do for 6 innings of work most times.)

5. It would send a clear signal to the league that the Cubs are for real, and intent on winning this year.

6. The Cubs can afford him. Clemens puts a big dent in our budget for 2006, but there's no way you pass up on that guy if he's willing to pitch for your team, even if his demands are 15 million for the rest of 2006. Plus he'd be gone after the end of the year, and the Cubs would have all that extra money from the playoff revenue to cover his 2006 expense, and to go after new free agents for 2007.

7. He's still good.

I know, I know, there's no way they're going to pursue him. There's no way he's interested in Chicago, unless someone can convince him that pitching with Wood, Prior, and Maddux would make for an interesting experience. But, what is a blog, if not a tool of speculation?

In other words, I'm not sayin', I'm just sayin'.